Eating Lunch All By Myself

I was cursed to have hair that is poker straight and grows straight out of my head.  There is no bend, whatsoever.   Imagine the roof on an A Frame house - that is my untouched hair.  It's been cut, dyed, teased, highlighted, shellacked, permed, unpermed, braided, shaved...not to mention thousands of dollars spent on products.  It's basically a work in progress.   I think it is fair to say everyone has a love/hate relation with their hair.  If you don't, we have nothing in common and will never be able to converse in small talk. My life has been an endless parade of famous haircuts - everything from the Toni Tennille to the Dorothy Hamill to the Markie Post mullet to the never changing Lisa Rinna.    I've also tried androgyny - if anyone remembers the 80's version of Darryl Hall which then grew nicely into the hair style for the lead singer of Kajagoogoo...Limalh.     One year my only goal was to French braid my hair.   I wore it braided to a Marine Corps ball.  It

 It snowed last night.  A lot.    But fortunately, we bought a snow blower two years ago almost guaranteeing it would not snow last year.   It did not. But, this is a new year and this is my review. Model:  No idea. Maker:  I don't know.  It came from Lowes. Features:  It's red. Price:  It was on sale. Review:   Getcha one. Short and sweet.  Everything you need to know.  Why waste several hours with a shovel when you can turn this baby on and be able to enjoy the rest of your day?   Even the boss gave it thumbs up.

Tagalongs are my favorite Girl Scout cookie.  Each year I happily and willingly spend a lot of money on a box of 14 cookies.  They are only available once a year  - so totally worth the indulgence.  My favorite part of eating them is scraping the peanut butter goodness with my teeth. I had sampled the Aldi brand before and thought they were pretty good.  Tagalongs are delicious and this was a great $.99 treat in lieu of a Girl Scout cookie.    At least that is what I told myself.   Bonus, I could also scrape this peanut butter with my teeth. But, which is the better cookie?  How could we ever know?   I had never eaten them together, as I had never considered wasting a Girl Scout cookie to eat a store bought cookie of the same variety.   I had never faced such a conundrum.  Armed with only a degree in journalism and a few hours to kill, I knew I had to get the answer. What better way to get to the bottom of this than a Pandemic Taste Test.   I put a crack team of cookie specialists toge

People must think I am an idiot.  Or bold.   Maybe they think I live on the edge.  I'm not really sure.  But this has been going on my entire life. My first memory is of our babysitter.   Every once in awhile we would be allowed to go out on the porch and watch the delivery of some milk trucks across the street.  The porch was concrete and about 5 feet off the ground.  Every time we went out there, the sitter would tell us, or me specifically, "Don't jump off the porch."   Even at that young age, (under 5) I had to ask myself - "Is she for real?"   Ain't no way you could even pay me to jump off the porch - why would I just do it?  We also had an elderly neighbor that I would visit from time to time.    She had an old washing machine that you had to put your clothes through the wringer.   Sometimes she would let me help her.  She would wind the machine and I was allowed to put the clothes through only AFTER she had started them through the flattenin

                                          I was overwhelmed with responses to my blog of Jan 19 Singing All By Myself !   Apparently, I am not the only person that mishears or  misunderstands lyrics.   I guess there is some sort of comfort knowing I am not the only one out there. I'll start with one from my own collection.  In the mid 70's there was a song Black Betty by Ram Jam.  Black Betty lyrics were "Oh Black Betty bam ba lam."    My brother would sing "Come back Betty in a scramble van."   A scrambler van, to the unwise, is a vehicle owned by the Barbie.   I kind of prefer that version! Several mentioned mishearing Jimi Hendrix say "Excuse me while I kiss this guy" instead of "Excuse me while I kiss the sky"  in Purple Haze.    It was the 60's.....could go either way! A Chicago fan mentioned singing "You're my motel lover" instead of " no tell lover."  She claimed she didn't know what a "

Why don't people respond to texts that require immediate attention or can be answered in one word?  Are you alive?   Yes. What time are you leaving?  9:30 What color is your car?  Silver What is the fastest animal?  Cheetah Beatles or Stones?   Stones See how easy that is!    Nobody is asking for a novel, paragraph or even a sentence.  A couple of words is all that is required. A simple emoji will also work.   👎🏻 🍾 🌨  🤔 👀   🐫 ⚰️   🦀   Apple and Samsung have done the work for you.  You just need to hit a button and everyone is happy. I promise if you answer my short text I will quit bothering you.  If you answer with more than a simple yes or no - there probably wont be a followup.   This will save a lot of time and government personnel as I wont have to call the sheriff to do a wellness check, physically drive to your house to see if you are hurt or scan your Facebook page to see if you ever mentioned Mick Jagger. And, maybe, I'll start answering your s